~real men don’t abuse women~
In actual fact,
- yep, they fucking do
- being a real man is associated with masculinity, and masculinity fuels violence against women, so yes again men abuse women
- campaigns like this prioritise the preservation of masculinity before the safety of women
If you’re on the journey towards self-love and self-acceptance, I am very proud of you. You’re doing great. Never stop believing in yourself and remember that it is okay to have a bad day.
Fellow survivors who engage in non-con or rape-play as part of coping or healing, I respect you even if I struggle to understand why you do it.
I will never tell you that you are wrong, or sick or broken. I won’t police your response to trauma or your healing process.
But please don’t expect me to be anything less than ambivalent towards your non-survivor sexual partners who engage in rape play with you.
I am downright suspicious and even hostile towards non-survivors who engage in rape-play and your partner/s are not exempt from that.
Please do not police my feelings on this.
It might not feel nice that I am hostile towards your partner/s, but that does not reflect on you and I am not interested in being made to feel guilty for this.
Being suspicious of your partner =/= being suspicious of you.